Get me OFF this crazy contraption!

It's the middle of May already .....
Jaysus.
Where is the time going????

I suck.

Actually, i'm just a dizzy bitch (literally).
No, really .... I AM.
I have been diagnosed with an inner ear problem called Labryntitis.
Basically, it's a ear infection that never really goes away and it fucks up my equilibrium. Everything is spinning like a merry-go-round out of control.
My ear hurts really bad, and doing just about anything takes a shit-ton of effort.
The best way I know how to describe it is: That feeling you get when you've had just a wee bit too much to drink.
So, I am dizzy.
And tired.

(May 22, 2008)
I've tried like 3 times in the past 2 weeks to get this post up, but as you see, i've had little success. It's difficult for me to sit at the computer for very long.
So, as you can imagine, work is NOT an option for me at the moment.
I finally had to throw up the white flag and ask for some time off to try and get a handle on my health situation.
See, I don't know how long this will last, or how often i'll have flare-ups.
The doctors so far have been no help. There is NO CURE for this, and there is no medication I can take that doesn't make me sleep for hours.
It sucks balls.
It's frustrating, and I know that the extra stress i'm (imposing on myself) feeling is making it worse, but honestly, what the fuck am I supposed to do for work? How am I going to support my family? Not to mention that my employer probably thinks i'm full of horseshit.


Anyhoodle, that's what's been happening in MY world.


OH! Did I mention that my previously VERY long hair is now not quite as long?
No?
Well .... I decided I needed a change a few weeks ago, and I woke up one morning and went to the first salon that had an open appointment for that day.
No more hair tickling my tush.
Seriously, it was THAT long.
Now it's a more manageable middle of my back.
And it has a STYLE now as well.
As soon as I can, i'll snap a pic and post it for you.

Hope all my 'murrican friends have a happy, safe and festive Memorial Day weekend.

Flashback Friday ...

Happy Friday!

Sorry I haven't been around much.
I've had a harder time than I expected getting back into
the swing of things and adjusting to my schedule.
You'd think it wouldn't be so bad ..... 2 days on, 2 days off.
Granted they're 12 hour shifts, but still ......
*sigh*

Getting old sucks rhinoceros balls.

Anywho, I will try and be better about posting, but don't get your hopes up too high.

So, how would YOU respond if you got a phone call at 3am from an extremely frantic man screaming that his monkey's have been stolen?
Yes, I said monkey's.
Two of them ..... marmocets to be exact.
(I won't tell you MY first reaction ... but it had something to do with "spanking")
Yea .......

On that happy note, for Flashback Friday, I think I need some raunchy whorehouse piano, compliments of Jerry Lee.




Aaaaahhh ..... food for my soul ......

Have a wonderful weekend y'all!

Happy Birthday!

I can hardly believe it, but my baby, my Pootwaddle, turns 3 today.
It seems like yesterday I was just blogging about his impending birth.
*sigh*
Where has the time gone?

HAPPY THIRD BIRTHDAY WOOBIE!

Mommy loves you .....

yeah yeah ....

No, it ain't April Fools Day ........ YET.
BUTT ....
I AM alive (barely)
I have NOT gone AWOL (yet)
and I AM sane! (ok .... that was a stretch)

I feel like the only whore in a town full of 18-25 year old men.
Only not quite as dirty.
Or fulfilled.

Anywho, just a quick update.
A few things I had 'forgotten' about being a dispatcher.
AND of being a dispatcher in Florida.
A. People freak the fuck out when the Space Shuttle returns back to earth and causes 2 sonic booms at 1am.
B. People freak the fuck out when the Revivalists START their laying of hands and speaking in tongues at midnight.
C. People freak the fuck out when they see a (possible) dead body laying in THEIR driveway.
D. People are fucking HILARIOUS when they call up at 3 (or so), drunk, and can't remember where they live.
E. People have WAAAAAAY too much time on their hands when they call ME at 4am complaining that their neighbor put his trash to the curb already.

I love my job.