Somebody shoot me ..... please????

*WARNING: Lame-ass post/rant/nonsensical rambling ahead*

I just read my own post from yesterday.
Not only am I lame, but apparently, I no longer remember how to write.
"Now I want to hear random titillating (LOVE that word!) tidbits about:"
I guess i'm so fucking incredible and powerful that I now have the capability
of HEARING y'all.
Through my blog.
Across thousands of miles.
Along with the many voices I already have chattering NONFUCKINGSTOP!

Hmmm .....

How much more fucktarded can I get?????
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My son,(the cutest baby ever) Poot, now has croup.
Fuck me gently with a chainsaw.
He awoke around 4:30 barking like a seal.
Drag him & my tired, naked ass into the bathroom and proceed to turn my ugly, but functional bathroom into a fucking Turkish sauna.
20 minutes later, Poot can breathe and I have lost 10lbs.
Too bad it was in my TITS!!!!!!!!!
Fuck.
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Christmas is in 2 weeks and 4 days.
I have nothing bought yet.

My Dad arrives in 1 1/2 weeks.
I haven't started cleaning yet.

I DID put up some Christmas decorations.
(Whoopdeefuckingdoo)
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In the "spirit" of Christmas, I leave you with this:



Ho fucking Ho.





*Author is not responsible for the burning sensation you feel in your eyes, or the intense desire to gouge them out after reading this shit.