May 1, 2005

Pasties, poles and thongs .... OH MY!!

I found THE hottest, most erotic, and potentially best way for me to get my post pregnant ass back in shape.

Pole Dancing combined with Carmen Electra's lap dancing video.

Billy Blanks? Fuck off. Winsor Pilates? Kiss my lily white ass. In fact, all you queer as fuck fitness gurus can go peddle your particular brand of shit somewhere else! I want a work out that will "work me out". *wink, wink, nod, nod* Added bonus: I could turn this into a new career! YEAH BABY!!!!

I even found a great site to get the right "equipment".

I'm quite fond of the thigh high boots .... the ones with the platforms and 7" heels, but I also like the classic FMP's (the classics NEVER go out of style!). I'm just not sure which ones I should get. I'm also quite fond of leather teddies, fishnets, pasties, and yes, thongs! So much to choose from .......

I digress. Sorry. So now that I know HOW to get back in shape, and have the proper "workout" gear, I need to get to work. It's time to put the kids to bed, lock the doors, put on "Brick House", (Ok, kiss my ass, I LOVE this song! "She knows she's built and knows how to please, sure enough to knock a strong man to his knees". Ask the Common Law) and start shaking my ass back into shape!

I figure it should take me a couple of months of intense "workouts" to get back in shape, and then ya'll can look for me at your local titty bar..... i'll be the trampy lil readhead with the kick ass thigh high boots, pasties (with tassels a swingin') and leather thong.
Oh, and if anyone's interested, you can become a Lap Dance critic and rate me. Come on, you KNOW you want to!

*SIDE NOTE* The Common Law does know of my new "workout" (and potential new career), hell, he's PART of it (one MUST have a proper audience you know!). In fact, he's the one who suggested the Carmen Electra video. He can't wait to watch it with me. Isn't he the best?!


At 11/17/05, 3:47 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

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