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January 11, 2006

BamBam

I have way better pictures of my son, Poot aka BamBam, aka cutestbabyever.
BUTT ....
This one cracks me right the fuck up!
(No, I did NOT put any rum into his bottle. Tempting as it may be, I have a strict rule; no alcohol till he can hold his own bottle and is 1!(Sheesh, what kinda MOM do you think I am??))

Anywho, my darling little boy is now a 22 3/4lbs, and 31 3/4in.
He's only 9 months old.
I don't have a baby, I have a miniature Abrams TANK.
Christ on a bike!
I know you didn't come here to read about the cutestbabyever,
Couldja indulge me for once, k?!
Great.

Yesterday was the doctors, today was blood work.
At The LAB.
AKA: Purgatory.
(For all you non-idol (NOT American Idol) worshippers, it is a place of eternal suffering)
After about 3 hours (no joke), get called into the back, am walked way into the deep recesses of the building, and what am I greeted by?
Some silicone enhanced, blonde, 20-nothing who is just TOO bouncy and perky for words!
I'm still not sure who was drooling more; the 9mo old baby boy, the 20-nothing silicone barbie bot, or me. (hey, she was HOTT, and I don't discriminate!)
We'll just call it even.
Silicone Barbie DEFINITELY had my son's attention (they ARE born that way ya know!) while she JAMMED a needle into his wee little arm.
I swear, his beautiful blues NEVER left her massive cleavage; even as he screamed his lungs out.
You woulda thought that we were re-circumsizing him.
Silicone Babrbie fills the tube, withdraws the needle, I hold pressure on the sight, and then, my sweet, beautiful angelic baby reached out with his other hand and got him a big 'ol handful of boobie.
Hers.
*sigh*
I'm so proud.
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