Absence or Abstinence ????

One makes the heart grow fonder.
One makes the heart grow colder.

You decide which is which.

So, have y'all missed me??
Didja? Huh huh ... didja?
You know you did.
If you didn't ..... lie to me.
No wait .... i'm not a fan of lying.
in fact, I rather despise lying.
Fuck it.
Do what you want.

Sorry I've been absent, but i've been busy.
I've been doing ACTUAL work.
Crazy, I know!

I was asked by a lovely, gentle reader whether or not I was still a firefighter during 9/11.
For those who may not know, I was a firefighter in New York (the state .... NOT City) for 5 years. I was a volunteer for my hometown fire company, Kenmore, NY.
I quit after I gave birth to sammich grabber #1, The Boy. That was back in 1995.
So Angel, I was not.
However, my brother, Lance, was a Paramedic for Kent County, Delaware. He spent 2 weeks at ground zero. Doing search & rescue first, and then recovery. He never discussed his tenure there, and we never asked. I always wondered how he felt about being there, and what his experience was like, but ..... now i'll never know.
He took that part of his life to the grave with him.
For as far as I know, I don't believe he discussed it with anyone.
Ever.

I wanted to go to NY after it happened, but my ex-husband threw an absolute hissy-shit fit ... so I stayed in Florida.
Part of me regrets it, yet, another part is thankful for my ex being such a dick.
Is it wrong to feel that way?
Service to others, and helping people in need has always played a big part in mine and my brothers' lives. My Dad has spent his life in service to the community at large.
All of us kids have been the same way.
Yet, I'm not sure how I would have handled going to NYC after 9/11.
I hope i'll never have to find out.