Peeps & Cadbury eggs

Happy Easter y'all!

Life changes ....

I seriously doubt anyone will read this .... and that's ok.
It's more for me to get my internal shit out anyway.

My last post was my birthday ....
I can't even begin to tell you the number of changes that have taken place since!

I'd say the biggest change is that Jack & I called it quits in November after 5+ years.
It was my decision more than it was his.  The distance had finally taken it's toll on me and
I wanted something else for my life.
It was/is heartbreaking ..... but also the right thing to do.

I've also managed to lose about 45lbs since July.
I feel fantastic and don't look half bad either ...  lol

For 46, i'll take it!   lol

Sadly, i've had 5 deaths in my family since October with the latest being last Sunday.
It feels like I have a black cloud hanging over my head.
Maybe it's karma.
I just know that I have never wished for winter to be done as much as I want this one to be done.

My oldest brother was almost killed in January.
He took out a utility pole at 2am on a VERY snowy, shitty night.
He was drunk.
Yes, he was arrested and yes, he will deserve whatever the Judge gives him.
It's my SIL and my nieces and nephew I feel bad for.

Speaking of my nieces and nephew .... my Q graduated as an Automotive Tech from college in December.  I am soooooo unbelievably proud of her!  She's working in a dealership and loving life!
My nephew graduates this month and already has a few job prospects lined up.
Again, I am an extremely proud Aunt!

There's been a whole lot more too .... trips to warm, exotic locations, attempting to date again (that's an entire post in itself!) ..... so much more!
I won't get into it all now .... i'm tired of typing.

Hopefully i'll be posting again more .... the dating alone might make me do it!
I do have a question to ask .... since when is it acceptable to let your freak flag fly high and proud on a first date????  Not that it's that big a deal ... I just wish someone had told me the new rules.
This getting old is pure shit!

Even a blind squirrel finds a NUT(case) every now and then .....

Last week, the lovely Becca over at Everyday Life was the hostess for Haiku Monday.
The theme was LOSS.
It's a subject that i'm sure all of us know just a bit too much about.
I know I do.

Anyway, Becca chose ME as this weeks winner!
Can you believe it?
I know I can't!
I stunned still!
And grateful.

Here is my winning Haiku:

36 years young
Body ravaged by cancer
Child bears witness

It was written in honor of my mother
She's been gone 34 years now.

So, now it's up to me to chose a theme and host this weeks Haiku Monday.

I thought long and hard about what theme I wanted, and I decided upon SEASONS.

Guiding us through time
Spring, summer, autumn, winter
Seasons of our life

Write about your favorite season (s), ALL the seasons, the seasons of life, love, music, bugs, amoebas .... whatever twirls your skirt!
Now, the rules:
5-7-5 format please (although, i'm not THAT much of a stickler!)
If you want to add visuals, video, music, etc. , that would be fantastic!
I don't care how many you enter, but I will only judge 2.
Just let me know which 2 please!  :)
Entries will need to be posted here by Monday at midnight PST.

I can't WAIT to see what y'all come up with!!!!
Happy 'kuing everyone!

INDEPENDENCE!!!!!

“I am no bird; and no net ensnares me: I am a free human being with an independent will.” 
― Charlotte Brontë, Jane Eyre


Welcome to Haiku Monday!
Our resident Southern Belle, Aunty Belle is our most gracious hostess this week.
In keeping with the upcoming holiday, Aunty has chosen Independence as the theme.

Independence takes on many forms .... from an oppressed people who band together to fight for their freedom, to a young woman striking out on her own for the first time.
I have chosen the latter to write about today.
My beautiful, smart, talented niece who leaves for college today.
She and I have shared many in-depth conversations and I consider it an honor that she feels comfortable
to come to me with anything and everything.
I will miss her terribly, but I know she will become more amazing and do incredible things!

So, here's to you Su-Z ......

Tough,sweet girl of Fall, 
17 and resolute,
Wings unfurled, FLY!

“How wrong is it for a woman to expect the man to build the world she wants, rather than to create it herself?” 
― Anaïs Nin

Have a safe and awesome week y'all!

Countdown ....

My son graduates from high school in three weeks
I'm excited for him.
And scared.
The world is a far different place than when I graduated.
A college degree doesn't guarantee fuckall.

Thankfully, he is going into a field that hasn't slowed down and doesn't really show any signs of slowing down.
Healthcare.
He wants to be a Physical Therapist.
He's already in his 2nd year of Personal Trainer, so when he graduates he can sit for his license and be a Certified Personal Trainer and work in a Gym or on his own while he's attending college.
He thought ahead about all this, which is more than I can say for myself.
I mean, I knew I wanted to go into healthcare, I just wasn't sure what I wanted to do exactly.
27 years since I left high school and I am NOT working in healthcare!  lol

Anywho, the countdown is on ... and I find myself increasingly torn.
One minute i'm excited, and the next i'm bawling my eyes out and then i'm mad as hell about every little thing he's doing (or not doing).
I have a graduation party for 3 (my niece and nephew are also graduating) to plan, buy for and execute,
It's the end of the school year and I have Dad to take care of, and well .....
yeah .....
I feel like i'm riding a psychotic horse into a burning barn!

On top of it all, it's JUNE.

The most dreaded of ALL months for me.

*sigh*
I feel like i'm whining and bitching, but if I don't write all this, I may have a nervous breakdown.
And I can't afford to have one of them.
I have too much shit to do.

Truth is .....

~ I had my hysterectomy almost a year ago ....
~ I still don't feel 'right'
~ I'm scared as hell that I will never be 'right' again
~ Menopause at 43/44 sucks donkey balls
~ Jack REALLY loves me (he 'deals' with my crazy-ass)
~ I'm excited about The Boy graduating high school
~ I'm also sad and terrified
~ The Boy starts his first real job next week
~ I have a VERY busy week coming up 
~ I'm thinking about going back to Adult Education and becoming an LPN
~ I have no energy
~ I try to stay positive
~ My electrical problems haven't been solved
~ My Father drives me nucking futs
~ I'm drinking more wine than ever
~ I hate that i'm currently sounding like a whiny little bitch
~ I'm going to finish my wine and Shut the fuck up

What's cooler than cool?

Welcome to Haiku Monday!
The ever so gracious Grins/Curmudgeon has chosen 'cool' as the theme AND he gave us
2 weeks to get our shit together submit whatever it is our minds come up with.

Black, white and furry
Arch enemy: Red Baron
Snoopy IS Joe Cool


It's not fantastic ... even with 2 weeks to work on it!
Ah well ....

Wild hair ....

As most of you already know, I am a natural born red-head.
A ginger.
Through the years, my hair has gone from strawberry blonde to dark auburn and everything in between.
Ok, so mostly it's now grey/gray.

Well, for many years now, I have dreamt of having REALLY dark, almost Raven black hair.
I have blue-grey eyes, fair skin and freckles galore, so severely dark hair like that would probably not look so good.
But  ... me being me, I decided to just take the plunge.

Here I am before:

And here's what I look like now:

Whaddya think?????

I may or may not have had a glass or two (5) of wine in pic #2.
Just sayin' .....

Dicking around .....

It's a great dicking around day .....
Chilly, rainy, altogether craptacular.

Now, if only I had a dick to be dicking with ......
*sigh*

For Heff .....

While trolling through the innawebs, I came across this lovely gem.
While watching it, all I could think of was, "TITS!!!!!!!".
The music sucks .... but hey, there's BOOBIES!
Lots and lots of boobies.
Not covered up either.

So Heff, this one is for you!

Patterns

Serendipity was the winner of Haiku Monday last week, and as such, she gets to choose the theme, host and pick a new winner.
This weeks theme is Patterns ..... and I have gone in a couple different directions with this.
They may seem a bit 'outside the box' .... but they are still within the Pattern theme.
Well, to me they are.

I hope you go over and have a read ..... the entries are outstanding and the entrants extremely talented.

Enjoy!

Gravity

Defying Newton

South - North flows Niagara

End result? The Falls

Field of Dreams

Artwork from above

Circular phenomena

Alien? Man made?

Double D .....

Yep .... i'm a Double D!

No worries ......

Halloo my darlings!
Being the Gatekeeper/Mistress/Maid of hell is rough.
I need a break.

The kind that have soft, sandy beaches ......
Sultry, steamy nights ......
LOT'S of free booze! (BONUS!)
I am off to the Caribe' for a much needed and long overdo vacation.
A real one ... not the one i've been exiled to since December.

I'll be back ..... maybe.
About 2 weeks or so.
I hope you all have a fabulous Easter and peace filled 2 weeks!

Irie Mon!

Just sayin' .....

Don't forget the chocolate.
Bitch.

VD

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm ....... BACON!

Titillating Tuesday ....

Nothing like hot cock on a cold day!
Yummmmmmmm .......

The Spirit of the season .....

It's Friday.
This may not be a "Flashback" .... but it's totally my style!




Enjoy the insanity heartwarming spirit of the Christmas weekend ....
Just remember to take a moment all to yourself and take in all the JOY.
Give bliss a chance!

Twinkle Toes .....

I really dislike black ice.
Especially at 6:30am.
In the dark.
When i'm NOT awake.
And i'm "off" coffee (doctors orders)

Thank god I have a big ass.