Autism Awareness

April is Autism Awareness month.
April 2nd is International Light It Up Blue day.
I know a whole bunch of people in the community don't necessarily buy into the
"Light It Up Blue" campaign.
They say it's more of a money grabber, and that the money collected doesn't even really go
into the community.
I don't deal with the community too much, but I know that the majority of money collected
for most causes doesn't really go to where it's needed.
However, I AM all about spreading awareness.
Especially since the numbers/odds have drastically changed.
It went from 1 in 110 in 2006, to 1 in 88 in 2008 to today ..... 
1 in 68 children diagnosed.
That's scary!

Little Man and I have had a rough couple years, but he continues to amaze, astound, frustrate and delight me. He's taught me so much!
He's my world.

Eye of the tiger ....

One of the things that my little man wanted for Christmas was a heavy bag.
It's the perfect way to work off some aggression.
And my sweet baby boy has A LOT of aggression in him.
He calls it his volcano exploding.
It's ugly.
The good news is that he has never gone after anyone.
Unfortunately, he turns his rage on himself.
So he asked for a heavy bag ..... to take his frustration out on it.
Understanding his "issue" and trying to find an outlet to help relieve it are monumental feats for him.





I'm so proud of him.
And scared for whoever pisses him off.

Parenting 101 .....

As a single parent of 2 boys, I have become accustomed to having answer some pretty tough questions.
Where do babies come from?
MOM! Why does my penis itch????
Where's my Daddy?

Yep. My boys have thrown them ALL at me.
Or so I thought.
Driving home the other night, lil' man blurts out, "Mommy, we're going to see each other again someday in heaven with God and Jesus, right?"
PAUSE
"I love God and Jesus!"
"Do you believe in God and Jesus Mommy?"
Christ on a cupcake .... REALLY?????
And there it was .... the one question I NEVER wanted to hear.
Or answer.
But my inquisitive 8 year old wanted to know.
And he wanted to know NOW!
I didn't want to lie to him.
But ... how could I tell him the truth?
How would my very much believing baby understand that his Momma is a non-believing, hedonistic heathen?
My "faith" disappeared years ago (with the help of a drunken, pedophile priest)
Looking into his sweet, innocent face, there was no way I could tell him.
It wouldn't be fair.
To him or me.
For him, it would crush his heart.
For me, it would just lead to other questions that I really DO NOT want to answer anytime soon.

So, I did what every good parent does ......
I quickly changed the subject, took him to the pet store to look at puppies and bought him a Slurpee.
I sure did.
I have no shame in my game.

HE DID IT!!!!!

My smart, funny, talented graduated son graduated from High School yesterday.
Some tears were shed .....

But I couldn't be any prouder!!!!!!

CONGRATULATIONS JOSH!!!!!!!!!!!

My niece and nephew also graduated yesterday .....

Best of luck to ALL 3 of you!

I LOVE YOU!!!!!

For my Mom ....

You are my mother, part of your flesh, born from your soul.
Somehow our characters blended, your wisdom and my will.
I turned, and you were there for me; I spoke, you understood.
I felt cared for, but also free.You loved, and it was good.
I am fortunate that I was born to someone just like you. 
I love you still.
Though you are gone, you live in what I do. 

Happy Mothers Day Mom!

Hard Lessons ....

The Boy is in the midst of a very heartbreaking and quite traumatic (and dramatic) on-again-off-again
relationship.
I'm trying my very best to keep my nose out of his business and just "be here" for him.
It's a struggle.
Not that I want to tell him how to live his life.
Especially his love life.
But ... the Mommy in me wants to keep on protecting him.
I can't.
I know I can't.

Hard lessons are being learned.
By both of us.

18

My baby .....

My firstborn .....

My son .....

Today you turn 18.
*sigh*
Where did the time go?????

I remember everything about the night you were born.
I remember being scared shitless bringing you home.
Just you & me.
Against the world.
That's how we've spent a lot of those 18 years!
I've made tons of mistakes.
But I hope you always knew how much I love you.

You changed my life in so many ways!
You also saved me.

Watching you grow into the man you're becoming has been a pleasure ....
and a deep honor.
I look forward to next chapters of your life ....

I love you son ...... always.
Mom
xoxoxoxoxoxox




HAPPY  18th  BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!  

Where did the time go????

 It seems like only yesterday The Boy was toddling around.
Learning to ride a bike.
Playing baseball.
Fishing.

Doing all the cool things that little boys love to do.

Not too long ago, we went to Macy's Mens Store and bought him his very first real suit.
A beautiful black shadow stripe, slim-cut, fully lined wool suit.
He was a bit uncomfortable having all his measurements taken and a bit fidgety for all the pinning and tailoring.
But he managed to get through it.

He selected the tie .... a gorgeous silk in a shade of pink/raspberry that I was honestly quite surprised at.
Next was the shirt.
He choose a lovely amethyst colored shirt with pinstripes of black and silver.


I was quite stunned.

This past Saturday, he and his lovely girlfriend attended the Tinsel Ball at his high school.
I did my very best not to cry when I saw him.
My breath caught in my throat ....
I choked up.

He was no longer my baby .....
He was a man.

I blinked ....

Dragon training ....

Yesterday my SIL & I took my boys and my youngest niece, BanaBoo, to see "How To Train Your Dragon Live".

Let me just say, if this show comes to your town and you have young kids in your life, take them to see it.

It's very entertaining.



The set, the music, the way they tell the story and of course ....

THE DRAGONS!





The boys were enthralled for the entire show .... even the 17 year old!

I couldn't have picked a better way to spend a chilly, rainy Saturday!

B2S

Let the Games begin!!!!!!



111 days till Christmas ......

Moving on ....

I went to a graduation party yesterday.
Two actually.
The first was for The Boy's BFF.
They've been pretty much inseparable for the last 4 years.
He leaves for the Navy soon.
I think my son will be lost without him next year.

The second party was for my BFF's daughter .... The Boys' first real friend, boy or girl.
It seems like only yesterday Kritter (my BFF)ad I were taking the kids out to the Pumpkin Patch for Halloween pumpkins.
They used to play together on many a Friday and/or Saturday night as we adults were downstairs playing Scrabble, Pictionary or cards.
It was actually more of an excuse to sit around with good friends and talk about life, have a few cocktails and unwind from our hectic lives.

They were toddlers..
So young.
They're still young .....
But now they're getting ready to embark on a new chapter in their lives.
It's exciting .....
and sad.
It means i'm OLD.
I don't know when that happened.
I still feel like i'm 28!
(I plan to stay 28 forever BTW)   

                                                                                                                                                              

My own spawn is now officially a Senior.
*sniff*



.

Cross Roads ....

That is the theme for this weeks Haiku Challenge.
I gave this one a great deal of thought ....
It became very personal to me.
This is where I was .... 18 years ago.

Two blue lines; Now what?
Unmarried single Mother,
Trip to doctor, Or ....



Go on over to Grumpy Granny  and go have a read .... or submit one yourself.

How Blazn' got her fyre back .....

Yes .... it's me.
I have returned from the beauty and warmth of Jamaica.
Before I get into the deliciousness of my vacay, I need to address a few things.

First off, I want to thank Rafa for choosing me as winner of Haiku Monday a couple weeks ago.
I was (am) completely gobsmacked.
Now, having won, I was supposed to host the up coming week .... but I went MIA.
Ok, not completely MIA, but definitely off grid.
I apologize profusely to ALL of you for just leaving without so much as a "thank you".
I want to thank Troll (who I hope is all right) and especially Boxer for picking up my torch.
You both are all kinds of awesome!!!!!
Speaking of Haiku Monday ..... The theme was SMOKE and Chicory is the winner ....
CONGRATULATIONS CHICK!!!!!!

Again, I thank you for the win and I apologize for disappearing.

I will be back in a day or two with pics, stories and my feelings on the Brown Shirt Brigade (aka: TSA (Terminally Soulless ASSHOLES)

For now, i'll leave you with a pic of Little Man on his Bday.
As usual, he expertly captures how we should all live our lives ......

I love this kid!

Sensory overload .....

Today is April 2nd .... the official Light It Up Blue for Autism Awareness.
This is a cause that is very near and dear to my heart ....

Little Man was diagnosed with PDD-NOS, which puts him on the Autism Spectrum Disorders list.
When I wrote this post last year, my baby was in a VERY bad place.

So was I.
We have come so far in the last year!
I wondered some days how or if we ever would.

He continues to amaze, astound, delight, frustrate and some days, scare the bejesus out of me.
Thankfully, we have more good days than bad days.

For kids with Autism or who have ASD, the senses are a huge part of the disorder.
Both good and bad.
Most have sensory integration issues.
Like Little Man ....

Both of my Haiku this week are not only for my son, but for others with ASD.

Jello? Too squishy

Clothing tags? OUCH! Deep, sharp knife.

Too much! Make it stop!

Sight, sound, taste, smell, touch

Emotions swirling, twirling

His sensory storm

Rafa is the host for this week ... and as you may have guessed, he choose SENSE for the subject/theme.
Please go visit .... you won't be disappointed!


 LIGHT IT UP BLUE FOR AUTISM AWARENESS!!!!!

Treasure ......

Well ... since I had fun with last weeks Haiku, I figured i'd try my hand at it again.

The lovely Chickory was the winner of last weeks Haiku Monday and is Hostess for this week.
She chose the subject/theme of Treasure.
As soon as I read it ... I was kind of inspired!
Well, as inspired as I can be for Haiku!  lol
(I fully admit, I LOVE reading them ... but I am NOT good with the writing of them!)
I invite and encourage any of my readers who don't participate to try their hand at it ... or at least go visit Chickory and read some absolutely amazing and talented writing!
Oh, and as an extra incentive, Chickory will be bestowing the winner of this week with one her FABULOUS pieces of artwork! (you can find her awesome work for sale here)

Anywhoodle .... I have 4 (four) this week.
They're not fabulous .... but they're all about MY treasure(s)!

I hope you enjoy them .....

 On a summer night,
We planted our seedlings
That became my life

Blonde hair, blue eyes
The very best of myself
My gorgeous boys

 Grubby little hand
Reaching for me in the dark,
Monsters chased away

Soulful brown eyes,
Searching for home through my screen,
We healed our souls

Go big .....

 .... or Go HOME!


Apparently, that was "Santas" creedo this year for Christmas.
See, the Mommess (mom goddess) decided to change her stance on
the "NO GUNS" rule here in hell.

"Santa" got the message!

(I forgot to add the extra 100 'bullets' )

We're doomed .....

"Hey Mom, maybe I should do my Christmas shopping at Walmart this year"

"Why son?"

"Well, I see that they have that new program. The one like Kmart, the stow-away program"

"um ... you mean LAY-AWAY?"

Just think, only another year and a half and he goes out into the world .....
ON HIS OWN!

(maybe I should pin a $20 to him and wish him the best of luck!)

Woobie-isms

"Mommy, I hope Santa brings me and my brubber (brother) Nerf guns.

You know, the ones with the fluffy bullets"

I love that kid ....
he always makes me smile and laugh!

From my son ...

I found this is my in box this morning .....

My boy ..... he GETS ME!

*sniff, sniff*

Watching the Wheels ....

Another week down .....
I only have 4 left till it's back to "the grind".
(Yes, being a school district employee allows me the luxury of being home with my boys)

My oldest and I have been having discussions of colleges, the military ...
all those wonderful conversations parents have when their kids grow up.

I can't believe how fast the time has flown!
*SIGH*
(I have to go cry again)

Anyway, here's my pick for this week ......

Enjoy ....... EVERYTHING!